090715

Recently I started losing myself again. My appetite's gone. My spark's out too. I'm feeling pretty much like an empty vessel. The memories keep haunting me like a spoiled record. Binding me up and playing back the painful scenes only. My eyes are burnt out. I don't know where or what I'm even looking at anymore. The pain; it's indescribable. I'm lost....in my own labyrinth in which I thought I had already conquered. Guess it was all a trick. I scroll through the pictures taken. Too much pain. So many words left unsaid. But I kept wondering if the same would ever happen to the current important friends I have. Will they vanish and disappear or will they stay and hold on? Haha, what a joke. Wasn't it I who left them first? I moved on, that's why I left that void. I broke us all up and I left that blame on them. Thinking that they forced me out. Maybe they did. But still, my guilt remained there. Never wavering. If only my spark was like that too. If only, huh....